Don’t Take the Bait!
By Wayne Harmon
In my last post I touched on offense. I want to expand on that theme, because it is such a serious problem in our lives. Recently I read a news report that an Air Force base in South Carolina removed a nativity scene because someone found it to be an “offensive” violation of the U. S. Constitution.
People are now offended that someone found a nativity scene offensive. It goes back and forth, offense for offense, until it looks more like a Three Stooges pie fight than a discussion among reasoning adults.
What’s the solution? In fact, IS there a solution? A lot of old sayings come to mind, like:
“When you wrestle with a pig the pig likes it and you both get muddy.”
And, “You might fight with a skunk and win, but you’re going to stink when it’s over.”
A few years ago I was in a situation where someone said I had offended him. He wanted to get together and discuss the problem. We had already done that on multiple occasions, and I had chosen to walk away. I didn’t “need” to be right. I wasn’t going to change him, and he wasn’t going to change me. As far as I was concerned this was a classic “agree to disagree” situation, and I was fine with that.
However, he wasn’t. He came in the name of “friendship”, and for a moment I considered setting up a meeting with him, but one thought kept running through my mind that wouldn’t stop, “Don’t take the bait!”
“Don’t take the bait?” What does that mean? I reviewed the conflict, our numerous discussions, my reasons for disagreeing with him, and my choice to separate myself from his plans. I didn’t try to subvert anyone else who had chosen to work with him. I didn’t openly criticize him. I just quietly walked away.
Then I saw what the bait was. If I met with him he could go back to those who, because of my departure, but without my knowledge, had begun to question his actions. He could tell them that he had spoken to me and that it was HE who decided he could no longer work with ME. Subtle.
I didn’t even respond to his invitation. I wanted to stay as far away from this trap as possible, and that meant not touching the bait in any way. Since that learning experience I have tried to be on the lookout for “bait”.
A baited trap entices its target. A good example of a baited trap is seen on the TV show “Swamp People”. Their hooks are baited specifically for alligators. Baited traps are set for specific prey.
That’s why I don’t get worked up over the “War on Christmas”. It’s a baited trap set to catch “Christians”. Some people actually let this silly pie fight ruin their own holiday celebrations.
Go ahead. Say, “Merry Christmas!” But don’t throw a pie when you do. Say it because you mean it.
And please, stay away from the “War on Christmas”.
It’s a trap.
Don’t take the bait.
Copyright 2013 Wayne Harmon